Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Elections 2008

So, I'm American. And I have a camera. And I have no shame.

Today was my first presidential election, and I was gonna document it. For those of you who wonder how elections work, here you go!

Step 1. Go to your local church.

Step 2. Say hi to the friendly campaigners 102ft from the voting station.

Step 3. Do a little dance because you came at 1:30pm, after the lunch rush. No lineup!

Step 4. Wander up to a random expectant-looking person, cross your fingers that you're registered, and sign your name.

Step 5. Gather your materials: one scantron-looking voting ballot.

Step 6. Head to polling station and insert ballot into voting device.

Step 7. Flip open the voting booklet, and choose a presidential duo by marking the hole with a black dot.

Step 8. Vote No on Prop 8.

Step 9. Once finished voting on other various items, such as a high speed train from San Fran to LA, take one last picture for good measure. Fold ballot closed.

Step 10. Tear off voting receipt from ballot, and Insert Here, face down. OMG which end first?!

Step 11. Retrieve "I Voted" sticker, valid for a free red, white and blue Krispy Creme, Starbucks, or sex toy of choice!

Step 12. Don't forget your souvenir "What On Earth am I Here For?" Trinitarian water bottle on your way out!

Well, I hope this has been enlightening for you. Go Team America!

1 comment:

Kate said...

Man, we've voted in churches a couple times up here too. Strange.